In writing about deepening love I feel like I first need to define what love is to me. Love is patient, kind, unselfish, truthful, interacts, engages, unrestrained, and protective. Some say love is colorful, but from my perspective it is transparent. Love is unhidden, inerrant, multiplicative, transcendent, sovereign, approachable, impartial, and inspires.
During the last four weeks I've experienced persecution, judgement, disconnection, shame, burden, and fear. In that experience I have become awakened, refreshed, transparent, accepted, open, heard, and welcomed by a room full of strangers whom without my knowing held a piece of my story. Our stories not being unique, yet made more valuable as they poured into one another.
I have learned that it is acceptable in the eyes of my Heavenly Father to be fully who he has created me to be. My gifts no longer a burdensome curse requiring alteration to enter a room. They are for him to be used for his glory, not to be judged. No longer does fear have its sharp grip on me. No longer am I held captive by my captors. I love more because I am free to love without expectation or restraint. Love himself pursues me and I humbly take my place as servant unto his will.
God saved a space for me at the same time creating space in my heart so I would have the ability to love more. Our first encounter years back I was drawn in through a state of brokenness, feet bleeding from the jagged ground I played upon. Now, we meet again in a room full of like minded individuals that only God could piece together with purpose. When they speak I am inspired to love and forgive completely. Self condemnation met inspiration and I have been renewed.
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